Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Its 2.15am..

Why am I awake??

I have no fuckin clue..

Oh well.. My life seems to revolve around the gym these days.. Strange how I used to hate the bloody place..And now I cant wait to go every other day. I love BodyCombat class..I love hip hop, I love Latino jam..I love Bollywood Jam..I love ABT, I love yoga, I love step aerobics..

Strangely..I have also come to terms with running on the treadmill..I used to hate running coz a certain psycho used to stand by my treadmill and increase the speed whilst standing there the entire 20 mins making sure I finished..

So you could imagine how I associated the treadmill with nothing but fear and hatred..But these days I just get on it and run..and run..and run..I'm even contemplating joining Shape magazine's women only 5km run..Any takers?

Someone asked me how I can just forget a 5 yr relationship like that.. According to this person, I should at least be on talkin terms with the psycho and this person even asked me how come I didnt call to wish him Happy Birthday..

Seriously.. why would I wanna ever come into contact with him again? I think its a sin to even coexist on the same planet as him.. I would only be sooo lucky if I never bump into him ever again.. How could you even think I would want anything to do with the person who hurt me so bad? Who abused me physically, mentally and emotionally? Who apparently cheated on me consistently throught the 5 yrs? Who made me afraid of going home in fear he would be waiting under my block? He isnt the same person I knew..Or rather thought I knew.. It was all a lie..A sham..He doesnt deserve my wishes..my calls..my concern.. As far as I'm concerned..He doesnt exist in my eyes. He is but nothing..

"I Need A Man By My Side, Not A Boy Who Runs And Hides"